The Figure
If you keep your eyes open while taking off or pulling on a sweater, you will make out his shape through the fabric. This is his only moment of influence on the tangible world, so do it quickly.
The Piano Wraith
If you sit up in the early morning you may see the shape of a tall man hunched over at your desk. Though he makes no sounds, he is going through the motions of playing Chopin’s Third Nocturne on the piano. Let him finish the song; he will crack his knuckles and fade away. Interrupt him at your peril.
The Night Dentist
Just before you wake you may feel her gloved fingers reaching into your mouth, or hear the squeak of latex on enamel. Keep your eyes closed until the feeling subsides so you don’t catch sight of her small mirrored eyes.
The Lash
With blunt fingertips and pursed blue lips, she blows a single white eyelash into your eye as you enter a house through a dark vestibule. Through teary eyes you catch sight her face just for a moment.
Lady with the Crown of Thumbs
You probably won’t have to worry about this anymore.
Troutface
Look outside a third storey window at 3:17 a.m. He will be standing beneath a street light, looking up at you. Match his empty gaze till he wanders off.
Cordsman
Keep your eyes open as you step into a hotel tub lest you find yourself dressed head to toe in corduroy for no reason. Now you must disrobe a second time. If this happens, the Cordsman is the guy that did it. The clothing may be kept or donated.
The Dolphin Queen
This is when you wake up next to a dolphin. It’s foul smelling and there’s seawater everywhere. The mattress is ruined. The dolphin must be released into the sea.
The Crumbsman
You could have sworn you cleaned of the counter before you went to bed. Well guess what? You did.
The Dairy Folk
They’re the reason you sometimes find a bone in a stick of butter.
The Grey Quoitsman
He wakes you up at like 6 a.m. to see if you want to play lawn games. You do but you mustn’t.
Wheatsmaids
They put wheat thins between your toes while you swim in the ocean.
